eat your sugar......just eat your sugar.

Been A Long Time Coming....

It's been far too long. I think the first time that any of us saw Danny Trejo, we instantly knew that his man deserved his own movie. There are very few people with THE Movie face. Another one is Terry Crews. These are guys who just have the look. They can say a million words by just looking at you. That is what Trejo has had in all the films that we have seen him in. Finally, we can now say that he will be getting the top-biling that he deserves.

I have been looking forward to Machete ever since it was announced that they would do a movie based on that infamous trailer. The added cast is a great bonus but to be honest, I just want to see Trejo rip guys open and be the next big movie star that he has always deserved to be. Just looking at his face REALLY scares you. There is something so deep and multi-layered about how his features have been carved out. That face was MADE for the movies. It all goes down September 3rd and like always, the UK gets shafted...AGAIN.

HH

Looking Beyond Batman 3

 Okay, I know what you are thinking right now. Why on earth do I have this guy in a turtle-neck as the photo? Who is this guy? This is Batman! Where is Bale?
  For those that MAY not know. The guy in the picture is Batman. Kilmer, Clooney, West, Bale have all tried and failed to really cement their place as Batman, although Bale had his very strong moments. Go on Youtube and the forums and see how many times Keaton's name pops up. He is Batman. The fans know it, I know it, you know it and this computer I am typing on knows it. We want him back. So many have followed after him and have just not had the IT factor that he had. Keaton had SCRAPS but still remained memorable because of how he approached the character with the right amount of subtlety and ambiguity.

Nolan is coming to the end of his tenure, helming Batman. It is fair to say that he won't be coming back after part 3 as he now will focus on his own Inception franchise. This leaves the space vacant for someone else to step in. Whil Warner Brothers try and FAIL at getting a suitable replacement, I have another idea. I know, I know; it won't get done because of the money-hoarding lackies up in the studio. But for the sake of talk, I think post Batman 3 would be an ideal time to do the motion picture version of Dark Knight Returns. Who better to play Batman than...BATMAN. Yes, it would make such perfect sense for Keaton to step back, after eighteen plus years to try and make sense of a whole new Gotham. It would work because we know this was the first true and only verified Batman and Keaton is much older now so the dots will connect ever so nicely. It's something different, rather than heaping on another trilogy with some hack new director. Oh, Double H, who then should direct this film then, you wise-cracking apple-pie?

Batman and Ridley is a perfect fit that nobody has seen. He will UNDERSTAND the darkness. He will UNDERSTAND the city. Oh man, I am just getting chills seeing what kind of film he will make from Dark Knight Returns. I think it is fair to say that Scott is a superior director to both Burton (you see, no bias) and Nolan (don't stone me!) His films that have revolutionised genres speak for themselves. I feel that it is something that is different but would excite him. A VERY grown-up FILM based on a graphic novel. I can see it now.

THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS 


DIRECTED BY RIDLEY SCOTT


STARRING MICHAEL KEATON

Do not tell that does not sound A-mazing.

HH

The Bursting of the Comic-Book Movie Bubble

This is a topic that get mentioned at almost every start and end of Talkback. When will this bubble finally break to bits? It really can't go on with so many misses, reboots and just plain horrible movies. It is slowly getting to a point, in fact it may already be at the stage were the gambits are the only ones that are keeping Kevin F and his master plan afloat. Fact is, money talks. The fanboys will be there on Day One and the average chum is still curious. That is where the cash is coming from and the studios are happy to feed the crapper, just as long as it churns out the cash. But fear not my amigos, I feel the tide is most certainly turning.
The Avengers movie and Nolan are two very important factors. Let us start with everyone's favourite Brit. The Batman número trois is coming and this will DEFINITELY be his last film. He finally has his franchise and he will very happily kiss Batman goodbye. This will be a huge loss for Warner and I will tell you what they will do once he leaves. Nope, they won't hire Ridley Scott or even Aranofsky to do something bolder and inventive. These goons will get a hack who they will try in vain to replicate what Nolan did. It is the thinking of a businessman. Try and replicate the product that the customer has enjoyed.
The second point her now is Avengers. I'm going to pit it to you straight. This WILL FLOP. Can you please tell me when last Joss released a box office hit? Burton has, like it or not Raimi and Bay both have. Surely it would make sense to hire either one of those three? But no, Kevin wants to get his Yes man to make the Avengers film HE wants to see. We have all seen Iron Man 2 and that Thor trailer. Please tell me how the Avengers movie will fare different?
2012 could be a decisive year in this long battle we have had. It will all be down to the fallout of the Avengers movie and when Nolan leaves the franchise. Who knows, 2012 could herald the coming of a whole new franchise. Perhaps the Chick Action flick?????

HH

Expendables UK Premiere Tomorrow

Yep, it's the UK premiere tomorrow. Yes, I shall be there. I hate premieres and I feel sorry for the guzzlers that go to every premiere because....they just want to see someone famous. Me however has only been to two premieres...EVER. Rocky and Rambo. It's something that is worth going to. Whether this film is bad or even worse, one must admire the rare breed of Stallone. I'm going out there just to show the love. I know for  a fact I won't be as lucky to get his signature again which SOMEONE that I cannot name missplace. DAMN YOU!!!! But I shall be there to show the love for all the guys that can make it. The guys who pretty much brought me up.
  I cannot say where I will be or how I will look because my identity must be kept....shhhhhhh. But rest assured, in SOME shape, way or form....I SHALL BE THERE.


HH

I Hate Michael Bay - Part 1 - Episode 1

And here is the ma who started it all. Look at that face. That smug smile. He knows he is pissing all of us of. Deep down he knows it. But my dear friends, I like to approach this hate I have for this man in a very mature way possible. No point in me ranting like a cat on a peacock's dinner. I want to give some clarification on why this hate is justified in this first entry.

You see, Bay does not make films...but he is in the film world. How can that be? I'll tell you how this is so. Two words. Tony Scott. The brethren by blood of Ridley Scott was the first, that i know of, to bring in the commercial style into motion picture movies. His movies are adorned with visual style that rips your eyes from left to right, up and down. Look at Man on Fire for example. The actor's words getting typed out, Denzel being filmed in a cool way with creative editing, it has its style which has been insulted but one cannoy deny its unique quality. With Scott's great success came Bay.

Bay can't do what Scott does. Scott STILL has scenes where people speak. There is STILL dramatic periods in his films. Scott knows when to be stylish and when to sit back and allow the actors to do their thing. Nuh-uh for Bay. He must swing the camera round WHILE PEOPLE ARE SAYING IMPORTANT PIECES OF DIALOGUE. In a commercial, this is great and will get you your freebies and Chicken Chow-Mein. In a film...A F I L M...it takes you out of the scene and make any piece of drama wither away into Californian Ice-cream candy bar.

I shall be posting more aspects of Bay that I hate but that is just one of the billions for you to chew on. He does not make films. He can't do scenes. He does not know how to structure a story together. Bay must be STOPPED.

HH

What Has Happened To The War Movie?

There was a time, some time ago...in an age...basically, there used to be a time when quality war films were made. I just watched Platoon recently and it got me thinking about all the top war films that have been made. You have Apocalypse Now, Full Metal Jacket, the incomparable Saving Private Ryan. None of these films were made in the last decade. Just take your mind back in the last decade. What good war films were made? I mean, the one that stands out is the Oscar winner; Hurt Locker.
  Hurt Locker is a GOOD war film, but is a long way from being great. I did not feel it was the strongest film that year, but politics and so forth go it the win. Oscar can kiss my ass for brunch. The thing about Hurt Locker is it never really gets you into the mind and psyche of the individuals. I could not really connect with the war they were fighting, nor did I feel invested in the environment or the story.
   Let's look at what I feel are two of the best war films. Platoon and Saving Private Ryan. Both films perfectly portray the environment and its aura. You did not have to be in Vietnam to know what Stone did with the visuals showed you how it was like. Spielberg somehow, SOMEHOW, managed to transport us back to the late 30's, early 40's and make us feel what hell may be like. NOTHING has come anywhere NEAR the horror of that beach. Call of Duty even mimicked it. In these films, you were IN THERE. From the very first moment, you were no longer watching a film BASED on Vietnam or World War 2. You were there. It was real.
   Another important component were the characters. Spielberg and Stone casted brilliantly. EVERY SINGLE actor in these two films was memorable. Barry Pepper, Ribisi, Vin Diesel, Tom Hanks and co. had an amazing chemistry that only Spielberg can create. You wanted them to make it, even though you knew they wouldn't. By the end, I was genuinely affected when they began to fall against ridiculous odds. With Platoon, the spontaniety and realism was just increble. Whitakker, David, the under-rated Berenger, Dafoe and co. managed to show you the comraderie of the forgotten citizens of Corporate America. It just felt so real. The "war movie" was done away with and what you were experiencing was a study on this pointless war.
We are yet to see a Private Ryan or Platoon for the Iraq War. And my gosh, there is A LOT that can be said about that war. With all the politics to do with religion, it is by far the deepest war in a psychological sense in all history. It reminds me of Kingdom of Heaven and how they tried to show the long standing war between Christians and Muslims. I feel that Bigelow and Boal did not go deep enough into this conflict and really show the grey areas of this war. It is a war that should never have been fought and is amidst the internet age where the average man is educated through the internet and is far more aware. These are just tips of a very dense iceberg that is the Iraq War. A truly great and important Iraq War Movie is waiting to be made. Correction, an Iraq War study portrayed through the power of cinema is still pending.


HH